World Breastfeeding Week - It's personal.

It is World Breastfeeding Week.

A quick check of the hashtag #worldbreastfeedingweek and it becomes clear that it is a subject that can still cause much divide on social media.

Do not, however, let that put you off from gathering the gems of advice or words of support it can provide if you are, or are thinking of, breastfeeding.

It is 3.5 years since I had a babe at my breast. From this vantage I would say that the breastfeeding experience for me was like childbirth. Give it enough time and I’ll start forgetting the hard bits and mainly remember an overall grateful experience.

My child birthing experience was not ‘easy’ but nor was it the devastation that some experience. The same goes for my breastfeeding journey.

I started writing bullet points, key things I could remember, but it became one hell of a list and the truth is that breastfeeding is a personal decision and a personal journey.

I was shamed for doing it. I was shamed for doing it so long, and I was also overly praised for doing it - used as an 'example' to shame others. I was criticised for doing it in public places, even when covered, and when choosing to go to separate rooms when other people felt uncomfortable. I was even shamed for choosing to cover up or leave public places where I felt uncomfortable. Breastfeeding is something some people have strong and vociferous opinions about. You will not escape criticism about how you feed your child no matter how you feed your child. It’s sad but true.

My breastfeeding journey was not easy, for a million and one reasons, but it was a beautiful journey and one I’m glad I both took and stuck to. There is nothing like that much needed sit down with your beautiful satiated baby in your arms to fill you with a natural chemical relaxation glow.

Breastfeeding was a joy in a sometimes hard period in my life. That said, it wasn't always easy. It wasn’t a consistent path. It was a rollercoaster 18 month journey that went through stages - some effortless and beautiful, some hard, painful, and exhausting. There were plenty of all types of tears. I could not do all those feelings justice in a quick piece on the internet.

For those who like lists, however, here’s my very personal top and bottom five things about breastfeeding.

Top 5:

• It's cheaper. Formula costs. So does all the kit. I didn't calculate what we saved, but I imagine it was significant.

• Have boob will travel. You can feed your baby even when you get stuck on a journey. Plus there’s much less stuff to cart round in your already huge baby bag.

• Poorly baby? Just had inoculations? Breastfeeding would often come to the rescue and calm and support a fretful baby. It did get us through illnesses. I actually extended my time breastfeeding because during a particular illness all she could stomach was breastmilk. I don't know the exact science, but it seemed to work for us.

• Not having to get up and make a bottle in the night.

• Oxytocin. When you're exhausted and soul weary, a release of oxytocin can calm, soothe, and remind you how it's all worth it.

Bottom 5:

• Breastfeeding through mastitis.

• The pain of engorged breasts.

• The pain of cracked and bleeding nipples.

• No one else can get up in the night, unless you’re pumping or combination feeding.

• Pumping, particularly if you are going back to work before finishing breastfeeding. I was useless at pumping. Useless. Whilst I could flow like an opened tap with a baby attached, it took me two hours to get enough to miss one feed when I wanted to enjoy a glass of wine on my birthday. I do know that this isn't the case for everyone, but I could not pump.

Look at me, I even forgot to put missing wine and having to go dairy free in my list - that’s what oxytocin does for you...

Breastfeeding was absolutely the right thing for us, and I am therefore an advocate of it. I am grateful I was able to, and I know not everyone is that lucky. I am an advocate of more tolerance and more support, especially where babies have food allergies. There is, however, a BIG BUT in my breastfeeding advocacy and that is that I'm an even bigger advocate of shameless choice. In any journey, in any child-rearing situation, you have to do what’s best for your personal circumstances. Formula is there. Specialised formula is there. They are both there for very good reasons - for a hundred and one individual, and sometimes compounded, reasons. Those reasons are yours and you don’t have to explain them to anyone.

Every family is different. Every situation is different. Learn, get advice, listen to other experiences. Look at your life, your family life, your health, and your child’s health. Put them all together and make your decision. Whatever decision you make, someone out there will try and shame you, unfortunately, and so the best thing to do is what’s best for you and yours.

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To find out more about World Breastfeeding Week, go here: http://worldbreastfeedingweek.org/

Because I’m a fan of the UK’s National Health Service, a couple of links on feeding.

- Bottle feeding Advice: https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/pregnancy-and-baby/bottle-feeding-advice/

- Breastfeeding: https://www.nhs.uk/start4life/baby/breastfeeding/

I haven’t found anyone better for honest and straightforward advice for breastfeeding babies with a cows milk protein allergy than Lauren at Dilan and Me: http://dilanandme.com/dairyfree/cmpa-faqs/

I never found good resources online for bottle feeding with cows milk protein allergy. Your doctor will make recommendations as to specialised formula to be prescribed and there are a number of online allergy support groups you can ask for practical and relatable advice. I'm sorry I can't help further here.

As always, if you have been affected by any of the issues raised in this piece, please consider whether you would benefit from accessing relevant support. See https://helplines.org/helplines

#highcroftwriting #worldbreastfeedingweek #words